Rating Everything: Drake's Billboard Game, Mac Miller & Ariana Grande, Spice Girls Reunion + More

Written By Sam Murphy on 08/31/2016

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A new feature where we give an unnecessary star rating to anything and everything that happened during the week...

Mac Miller and Ariana Grande
3Star
Miller and Grande debuted their new relationship at the MTV Awards which is usually a place for debuting new music or nudity but, hey, new relationships work too. They look good together so we're awarding points for that, however, they are already starting to do odd things in public like crouch on a sidewalk so we've had to deduct points from that. While we're big fans of Ariana Grande's debut single The Way which featured Miller, Miller's remix of Into You stripped it off its pop greatness. Let's hope they can redeem themselves on My Favourite Part, a collab track on Miller's new album.

Drake's Billboard For Rihanna
3Star
So it seems Drake has taken over every Billboard in America this week. He teased a Kanye collab, had one saying "top 5 top 5 top 5" and also congratulated Rihanna on her VMA Vanguard Award. We're big fans of the gesture but we're not so keen on the font choice and the capitalisation of "Everyone". We also think a text to Rihanna might've worked given that their quite close at the moment but then again, we have been saying for a long time that billboards are the new iMessage.

Tkay Maidza
4Star
Apart from her single with Martin Solveig we haven't heard anything new from Tkay Maidza but she gave us all the things this year, emerging from hibernation to drop a banging new single Carry On featuring Killer Mike and news of a debut album. The album's called TKAY is has 14 (!!!) new songs including the new single and it has a cover that looks like it's been torn straight from the glossy covers of Vogue. Don't even get us started on how good she sounds on Carry On and how her and Killer Mike are a match made in heaven because we may combust. Australia's been waiting too long for a bonafide star with style, flair and a penchant for innovation and she's finally arrived. The album's out 28th October and if you're not excited about it, carry on.

The Swedish iTunes Chart
4Star
Everyone knows that the Swedes are fine purveyors of pop so in this week's Rating Everything we're looking to Sweden for a lesson in how to make an iTunes chart. Clearly very impressed with Beyoncé's VMAs performance, they've launched five of her Lemonade tracks into the top 10. Apart from the bizarre inclusion of an Enrique Iglesias song and Justin Timberlake's wet blanket of a hit Can't Fight The Feeling, they've made very few mistakes here. There are two Swedish songs in there and they're both high quality (need it be said?) Swedish pop songs.

In comparison, Australia hasn't made any effort to find room for Beyoncé as her highest charting song is Hold Up at number 27. Rudeness in its most pure form.

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The MTV VMAs Controversey
1Star
It's difficult to rate this one because there was zero controversy. These are the awards where Britney kissed Madonna, Kanye announced his bid for presidency and Miley Cyrus gyrated a dead man Robin Thicke and yet this year we got nothing. Kanye barely ranted, Miley didn't even show up and even Taylor Swift saw the opportunity for more controversy at jury duty. Very disappointed MTV.

The Most Played Song On triple j This Week
3Star
It's a D.D. Dumbo song called Walrus which is taken from the Aussie artists forthcoming debut Utopia Defeated. It's very triple j but it's also very good so in that way it makes a lot of sense that they're giving it heaps of air time. It's also fitting that this is their most played song in a week where their feature album is Big Scary's Animal.

Fun fact: a walrus is an animal.

Melanie C's Attitude Towards A Spice Girls Reunion
4Star
We ranted about this Spice Girls GEM reunion bullshit a few weeks ago and now Melanie C has said what we wanted to say in an eloquent, first person manner. After Victoria dropped out because she's got too much money to flog a dead horse Sporty decided, "something didn’t feel quite right." That something was that, it wasn't the full Spice Girls.

"I'd love to play huge arenas across the World, sing our brilliantly bonkers pop songs and relive our former glory," she said.

"It is of course a very lucrative opportunity too. But we were a five-piece band. Didn’t we reach a peak with the Olympics? There's a lot to be said for bowing out on a high note."

You're quite right Melanie Chisholm. If you try to revive an act without the full lineup, before you know it you're supporting a reformed Atomic Kitten as S Club 7 minus 4.

Rihanna's We Found Love
5Star
She performed it at the VMAs and we can confirm it's still the greatest song of all time.