Nickelback On Penis Size, Sex & The City And Being "The Most Hated Band In The World"

Written By Rei Barker on 04/14/2015

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Whether you love them or hate them it's hard to deny that Nickelback are one of the most talked about bands in the entire world. The Canadians have been making music for nearly two decades and in that time they have endured both hits and hate. Nickelback are not a band we've featured often on this site, if at all, but we jumped at the opportunity to sit down and address the elephant in the room: why are they one of the most hated bands in the world? Of course, that also led to questions about how big their penises are.

We had a candid conversation with keyboardist Ryan Peake and were surprisingly charmed. For best results, listen to the Soundcloud audio. Full interview below.

[soundcloud width="750" height="200"]https://soundcloud.com/theinterns_net/nickelback-interview[/soundcloud]

 

Rei: You probably get asked the same questions a lot. What do you never get asked? What have you always really wanted to talk about?

Ryan: I never get asked: If I was to write a TV show about the future, what would I do. What have you got? Give me something. What do you think I’ve never been asked?

How big’s your dick?

Hahaha! Funnily enough, I’ve been asked that many times before you know. You can go back on old interviews and you’ll be able to tell exactly how big it is.

Fuck! How boring.

You’ll be happy to know, everybody will be happy to know, it hasn’t gotten any smaller since the last time I said.

I hoped you’d never been asked that before but I guess you’ve been doing this for a while.

We have been doing it for a while but it never gets old.

If you were going to write a TV show about the future, what would it be about? Give me a 30 second synopsis.

Oh, geez...let me think. It would be about finally discovering where the universe came from and Nickelback were the cause of the Big Bang. It would be something about that.

“The NickelBang Theory”.

*laughs* I’ll give you credit for that, I like that.

"We never got into this to be the most hated band in the world, trust me, we never tried to aspire to that."

Thanks, man. I want to take it right back. Obviously Nickelback are very commercially successful. You guys get a lot of hate, as well as a lot of love.

Sure.

For example, Rolling Stone did a ‘Worst Band of the 90s’ thing and you guys got second behind Creed. Were you just like, “Oh man, we were hoping for number one” or was it like “We don’t really give a shit, we’ve got heaps of money.”

It’s like a sports team. If you’re going to be one of the worst bands, you might as well be the worst. It is what it is and we’ve kind of grown some thick skin and we play for our fans but we definitely get our fair share of people that love to tell us how much they don’t like the band and that’s fine.

If people are fair about it and they don’t like the music for certain reasons, that’s fine. I have absolutely no problem with it. Not everybody likes all types of music. Just when people are blatantly being mean, it’s kind of lame. If you’re clever and funny, I’ll give that to you. I like a joke as much as the next guy.

It gets very easy to tell people how much you hate things. With the internet today, you can hear what everybody thinks. It’s not like you have to be a select journalist or have any qualifications, you can hear from everybody on what they are angry about. And that, in itself, that sentiment itself, is so ubiquitous these days. Twitter’s just poison. People get so angry and upset on that thing. I take it with a grain of salt because I don’t think a lot of these people would do that to people‘s faces.

Truly! I don’t mean that as a threat, if these people are angry at something, “Oh, I hate this person and they’re such a douchebag on TV” or whatever it is and then they meet that person and they’d be like, “er...er…” and they wouldn’t be so courageous in their objections about a certain talent in person because it’s a whole different thing. Online, they just let ‘em have it. I just take it for what it is.

"Twitter's just poison." 

I guess it’s one of those bands, like Creed who got number one in the ‘90s thing, or Justin Bieber, where it’s like plucking low-hanging fruit in a sense. Everyone does it. If you say, “Fuck, I hate this band,” no one’s going to get angry at you for it.

You’re totally right. If somebody told me, “Oh god I hate this band”, no one would care. If you’re trying to pick somebody that’s got a point of reference for people, people are gonna be like, “Oh yeah, I totally get it.” I think we’ve become part of the low-hanging fruit thing. It’s not really clever anymore. If it’s funny, hey man, funny’s funny. And I love comedy stuff. If you want to take the piss out of me, that’s totally fine. Again, if it’s meant to be, if it’s just for the comedy sense of the thing, it’s fine. But if somebody’s being a dick...at least be a real clever dick, don’t just be copying the same stuff. It’s been done. It’s old hat. It’s not new.

What’s the most clever or funny diss that you personally, or Nickelback, have ever got?

You know what, I haven’t seen a ton lately. There’s one, it’s not so clever necessarily, though I did laugh when I read it because I wasn’t expecting it. Billboard magazine that did an article when we signed a touring deal with Live Nation and they made a deal of it. They were like, “Nickelback’s signed with Live Nation for a touring deal” and someone made a comment under that saying, “I wish Nickelback would sign a deal to leave the planet.” I was like…eh. That’s pretty good. That’s fair enough. You hate us so much, you want to shoot us into space. I don’t collect all the clever ones, but when I do burst out laughing, when I haven’t heard it before and it makes me chuckle, I like that. Most of them I’ve heard before.

I’m not particularly a big fan of Nickelback but I’m more just, I don’t care. I can’t be bothered hating shit for the sake of it, I’ve got better things to do.

Well, exactly. I’m a fan of music and I’ve got the bands I like, the bands I don’t like, and I just don’t typically waste my time on that. Especially a journalist. You nailed it right there when you said it’s low-hanging fruit, it seems easy. If you were the first guy then that’s totally fine, I’ll give you kudos for that. But at this point, it seems like such an easy target, it feels like I’ve read this article six thousand times before and I would think people would skip past it. You know, it is what it is.

Yeah. Well, when I got this interview, I was like, what do I do? Do I try to be funny? Do I take the piss?

*laughs*

I’d rather just see what it’s like, you know. That’s not clever to do that, that’s just boring. And it’s like, oh okay, yeah. Some pissfart journalist from Australia thought that he was clever and, I do think I’m clever, but not in that way.

Most journalists do. I’m totally fine with that. I totally don’t expect everyone to like us, you’re a bit delusional if you expect everyone to like you. You can’t please everybody all the time. But, like I said, just be fair. If you just don’t like the band because of A, B and C, that’s totally cool.

People don’t realise that this band is made up of four people all lumped into one entity. And there’s four different personalities of actual people in this band and some are portrayed louder than others and that’s the band. We never got into this to be the most hated band in the world, trust me, we never tried to aspire to that.

"If somebody's being a dick, at least be a clever dick."

Which one are you? Which Ninja Turtle are you?

What do you mean? *laughs* They’re a little bit past my time. Who else could I compare us to?

It’s like the four personality types: Ninja Turtles, Sex and the City, Entourage…the four temperaments, you know?

Exactly. That I get. And you’ve just listed three things…that would be a trap for me to answer, to compare me to which Sex and the City girl I’m like…

Everyone thinks they’re Carrie, but they’re not, y’know?

Exactly, everyone wants to be the Carrie.

I don’t know, maybe Chad’s Carrie. He seems like he might be a bit of a Carrie.

I would say he’s the…who’s the one who’s always getting laid all the time?

Samantha!

She seems like she’d be a fun match. We all have our moments but I think I’m the Switzerland of the band in a sense. I never got into the fame…fame is a very strange thing in that it comes part and parcel with what we do. I like to play music and I like to hear people sing along and that’s what makes me happy.

Is Avril Lavigne cool?

Is she cool? Yeah, she’s great.

Because I guess everyone was like, “What the fuck? (Chad and Avril) are getting married?” Like, you know?

Yeah, I know. I know.

I actually did hear a pretty cool stripped-back piano cover she did of How You Remind Me and it’s pretty good. I actually really liked that.

Yeah. I was surprised to hear that, they showed me when she recorded and I thought it was better than our version! *laughs*

Yeah, me too! It was definitely not what I expected. Sk8er Boi is a Karaoke song that I go to sometimes but I was like, okay yeah, sick. This is cool. It was well done.

Absolutely. And I think it’s very brave of anybody to cover a Nickelback song. You really put yourself out there. *laughs*

Was that pre-relationship? Or during?

You know what? I would totally be guessing. I remember him showing it to me and I don’t recall. I think it was early relationship.

It would be so cool if it was pre-relationship and he got in touch like, “Thanks. That song is dope.” And then they got together from that. That’d be sick.

*Laughs* I’d like to think they’d meet us first. I don’t know anyone who was brave enough to cover without meeting us first. Like I said, they really put themselves out there in that way.

Last question: What’s your least favourite band ever?

Oh geez. I don’t really know if I have one. I’d be slinging mud. I’ll be doing to them what people have been doing to us, I’m not going to do it.

C'mon. 

Ok, Habits.

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Nickelback embark on their Australian 'No Fixed Address' tour this May. For ticket information, head here.  

ROD LAVER ARENA, MELBOURNE

FRIDAY MAY 15

SATURDAY MAY 16

ENTERTAINMENT CENTRE, ADELAIDE

MONDAY MAY 18

ENTERTAINMENT CENTRE, BRISBANE

WEDNESDAY MAY 20

ALLPHONES ARENA, SYDNEY

FRIDAY MAY 22

ENTERTAINMENT CENTRE, NEWCASTLE

SATURDAY MAY 23

PERTH ARENA, PERTH

TUESDAY MAY 26